It's tempting. Of course it is. It would devastate Sagramore. Wrenching Shen Yuan away would hurt him in a way no one could possibly blame Luo Binghe for. It would only be fair.
The thought of the two of them continuing their friendship—enjoying each other's company, laughing, sharing drinks, all without Luo Binghe—arouses something ugly and dark within him. Stopping it would feed the hot satisfaction he has been chasing for years, the addictive rush of watching Qing Jing Peak burn to the ground, or taking the daughter of an enemy to his marriage bed. The reassurance that those who hurt him will pay. That he doesn't have to simply endure suffering, like when he was a powerless child. The world, now, rights itself around him. It is the least he would do to Sagramore, if he were the man his wives have always known him to be.
But it would hurt Shen Yuan as well. He'd pretend it didn't, if he thought it was what Luo Binghe wanted, but Luo Binghe knows what Shen Yuan is like when he is pretending not to be upset. Losing his train of thought, stumbling over words. The unconvincing smiles. He can't be the one to cause it.
It strikes him why he has always held himself back from love, holding even those closest to him at arm's length. It truly has weakened him. It has made him easier to hurt, and taken away his ability to protect himself—he thinks unhappily of allowing Galahad to threaten him with no recourse.
Yet, still he chooses it. Now he truly understands the meaning of the saying "A beauty can destroy an empire."
The answer is no, but Luo Binghe still wants to stall a little before answering. "You would do that for me?"
no subject
The thought of the two of them continuing their friendship—enjoying each other's company, laughing, sharing drinks, all without Luo Binghe—arouses something ugly and dark within him. Stopping it would feed the hot satisfaction he has been chasing for years, the addictive rush of watching Qing Jing Peak burn to the ground, or taking the daughter of an enemy to his marriage bed. The reassurance that those who hurt him will pay. That he doesn't have to simply endure suffering, like when he was a powerless child. The world, now, rights itself around him. It is the least he would do to Sagramore, if he were the man his wives have always known him to be.
But it would hurt Shen Yuan as well. He'd pretend it didn't, if he thought it was what Luo Binghe wanted, but Luo Binghe knows what Shen Yuan is like when he is pretending not to be upset. Losing his train of thought, stumbling over words. The unconvincing smiles. He can't be the one to cause it.
It strikes him why he has always held himself back from love, holding even those closest to him at arm's length. It truly has weakened him. It has made him easier to hurt, and taken away his ability to protect himself—he thinks unhappily of allowing Galahad to threaten him with no recourse.
Yet, still he chooses it. Now he truly understands the meaning of the saying "A beauty can destroy an empire."
The answer is no, but Luo Binghe still wants to stall a little before answering. "You would do that for me?"